It’s really been four months?

I log on to WordPress and it says it’s been four months since my last blog. I guess I’ve been at a loss for words. (Pun intended). I’m sure none of my followers has lost sleep over this. I did on the other hand did have a period of some lack of sleep for no apparent reasons.

I haven’t blogged because the last few months have been stressful to me and I think I have been sad. I do not handle stress well. I looked up stress and it’s just a way your body responds to demands and threats. They say your body goes into a fight or flight mode. I believe my body does this on a regular basis and there is really no threats or demands that are in my life that are worth the pain and headaches this causes within itself.

I get stressed very easily. If there is too many things to do in the upcoming week I stress till every little task is completed. This explains the last four months. There has been so much more added to my daily life that I’m trying to adjust. Then there is the regular stress that most people have already in their life financial, family, careers. Those alone can send someone into a stress related coma.

When I get stressed my body tenses up more than normal. My muscles stay tight already so it’s like I turn into a brick wall literally. Then if I feel my todo list is more than I can handle I start an elimination process. I get rid of anything extra I have planned to do that week that doesn’t need to be done. These things are basically extra curricular activities I’ve set for myself. It could be time I set aside to exercise, time I planned on doing my prayer journal, sit outside and drink a cup of tea, or family time.

When I look at what I take out of my stressful week to make it easier. I’ve actually took out everything that could potentially make life less stressful. It’s just at the time when I’m focused on seeing the weekly tasks ahead I put them all together and it turns into my mind seeing everything needs done now mode. So, I take out anything I can for it to seem less bewildering to me.

No, I’m not blogging to complain but to maybe help someone like me. I know that this way of dealing with things is not healthy. It’s just hard to change when you’ve been this way your whole life.

The last three weeks have been especially crazy for me. I’ve been so stressed out I’ve either been on the verge of tears or biting someone’s head off for no apparent reason other than I lost control figuring out how to deal with life.

Honestly my life isn’t really stressful just normal. I just make it stressful by not dealing with deadlines and daily tasks as well as most people can.

For instances, if I have more than one extra thing to do in a day that was not expected. I stress out till that day is over. I’m such a planner that when things happen and I have to change or move things that I’ve already set in my head to do. I go crazy until I can make it work. I’m definitely not one of those fly by the seat of pants kind of people. I’m also one who is not at least fifteen minutes early to an appointment I consider myself late. Lol

The only thing that kept me sane the last few weeks was praying. If the Lord did not help me see things differently I think I would have had a nervous breakdown by Thanksgiving. If I do not learn to control stress it will control me. It has already caused physical ailments here and there. If God forbid something big happens I’d probably end up in the grave because if I can’t deal with little things, big things will take me down.

The thing is I pray more for others than myself. Which it is great to pray for others. Just don’t forget that your important too. When I finally decided to get down off the pity pot. I stopped and prayed about everything that was going in my life that overwhelmed me. I actually was able to be grateful for how God intervened on my behalf. He made what looked to me as a mountain in the beginning seem as just a little bump in the road when it was over.

I guess I’m blogging after four months of not to say. Take one day at a time because you can only take care of present. The past is gone and the future isn’t promised. I’d hate to think I wasted a beautiful day and end up dying before the day I worried about came.

It’s not easy for me to do what I know is right. I know prayer changes things. I know God won’t let me down or give up on me. The struggle of life is real. Just hang in there if you feel the way I’ve been the last few months. Keep praying and when things change you will be stronger for what you endured.

Thank You so much for reading and God Bless!

Starting to feel alive again

I’ve been doing low carb for a week now. If you read my last blog you know I’m doing it to reduce my sugar intake due to inflammation.

I’m happy to report I’ve lost five pounds. The scale actually kept going down and stayed down. Usually, I weigh myself most mornings and my weight fluctuates one-three pound difference. It’s very discouraging. I only went up a few ounces the day after cheat day. It came right back down with one day of eating right.

Finally, I’m making progress. I’m not only seeing a weight difference but I’ve felt so much better. I have not had this much energy and clarity since March. I kinda keep a monthly diary and that’s how I know it’s been a long time since I felt this good.

I haven’t been depriving myself of anything either. I find a new way to eat the food I like and for the not so healthy ones I just cut the portion size way down.

So, if your struggling with inflammation, weight gain, bloating and pain. I do suggest going low carb.

I had small serving of cheese sticks from Arby’s on a regular day. It took a lot of my fat and carbs for the day but it satisfied my craving and I just made sure the rest of the day I ate only healthy food.

My cheat day was another story lol. It was Father’s Day and I made peanut butter fudge. I ate three servings. I made sure to get my workout in that day!

It’s okay to splurge once in awhile but I got to where everyday I was splurging. I wasn’t mindful of what or how much I was eating. Late night snacking was turning my body into mush.

I know I can lose weight but I’ve got to learn that I’m someone that can’t diet. I am going to have to stay focused all the time or I’ll fall quickly back into bad habits. I found that out the hard way.

I want to lose the weight once more and not find it again after the holidays.

My struggle is real but so is my will to live.

Thanks so much for reading, and God Bless!

Hurry Up Spring

It’s been a little over three weeks since my last blog.

My life has been uneventful. I don’t mind though. The older I get the more I enjoy being home. We have had a few teaser spring days since my last blog. Supposed to have a few more the next few days just for it to be taken away the day after spring officially arrives.

Daylight savings time is here and that makes me happy. It’s crazy that one hour forward makes some people happier and others not so much. I’m not a morning person so that must be why I like the longer evenings.

I’ve been doing Zumba on Mondays. It’s a good workout. I try to take walks when it’s warm enough. I was jogging then the weather stopped cooperating and I was forced to stay in. Okay maybe forced is a strong word but I don’t like cold weather. It makes me hurt all over. Another annoying thing about getting older. This week I had ZUMBA class twice. There was a group of college kids in for spring break. They liked Mondays class so I had an extra class for them today. They were so sweet. Kinda, felt young for awhile there.

Tomorrow, I’m going Easter dress shopping with my youngest. I have to say I am quite upset with myself. I have not lost any weight I gained. I have been losing and gaining the same four pounds over and over. I took a whole year to lose weight got where I needed to be just to gain half of it back. I had my picture taken today and a side view is never really a good angle. Today, was no exception to that. I was so disgusted in myself. Maybe it was the kick in the pants I needed to get back on track.

This week I have done good. No eating after 7:30 and I am trying to plank at least 30 seconds a day. It’s a challenge we’re doing in a group.

I know I am whining a lot but this is real. Where I logged my weight with the Fitness Pal app for the last few years I notice a pattern. I am always heavier in the winter than any other season. I am the smallest by the end of summer and early fall. Which coincides with I’m happier during the times I’m smallest and kinda depressed in the winter lol.

I just thought I’d share in case someone else might be feeling like me. I might get knocked down but I always get up. One of these days I’m going to stay up. I just gotta figure out how.

Thanks so much for reading and God Bless!

My Struggle is so real!

I thought that January was a rough month till February came. The first 1/2 anyway. I had the winter blues for a few days. Our weather is crazy. It was cold one week then we had rain the next and that caused some flooding in the area. Thank goodness I’m on top the mountain.

The past couple days have been awesome. The sun has been out and the temperature is in the mid 70’s. Now, I can actually get outside and relieve built up tension by walking or jogging.

I also need to get off this weight I gained back. It’s crazy, it took a year to lose enough weight for me to feel happy and comfortable with my appearance and I felt pretty healthy too. In three months I gained back half of what I lost. Many factors contributed. Holiday goodies, weather, lack of sleep, and a lot of stress. Let’s be real though. The biggest problem is I ate way more than necessary. It had nothing to do with burning calories because I still managed getting a workout inside the house. I just ate too much food that was bad for me. I let my emotions take over and I would eat junk food to make me feel better. Now I have to work extra hard to get in shape again.

You ever wonder about those that look like their lives are put together? Do they really enjoy getting up in the morning and exercising? Do they make mistakes? Do they not have stress? Is their life that perfect? My guess is no because perfection is really something you try to get but doesn’t really exist. That’s my opinion anyway. The closest to perfection is doing your best! So, I just have to ask myself everyday, was that the best you could do?

Thanks so much for reading and be the best you can be! God Bless!

It’s February ( how’s the resolutions going?)

It’s a month into the year and by this time most people have forgotten the resolutions they made or gave up because they couldn’t stick to them. There is still the few that remains that hate to give up and be considered a failure.

I’m still sticking to mine with a few bumps in the road. I hate giving up. I also try to not make any resolutions out of my comfort zone in fear of failing.

I’m still trying to see the good in everyday no matter how bad it was. This week was quite the challenge but I managed to find the silver lining. Sometimes right before midnight but nonetheless found ways to be grateful.

My exercise/diet challenge is a little harder. When it comes to cardio I’m great but eating is another story. I did good last week till the weekend. My youngest had a birthday on Saturday, my husband on Sunday, and there was homemade cookies my youngest had to bake for 4h. It was sugar-land at my house.

Eating good some days and very bad the other days has sent my body into turmoil. My IBS/C has been excruciating the last few days. Excuse me for this topic but if you have it then you’ll understand. I don’t remember having this much pain (feels like knife in side) for more than a few days. It will be a week tomorrow I’ve been dealing with it. I’m going to give it a few more days then I guess I’ll have to go to the DR.

The weather has been quite crazy here too in Tn. One minute it’s raining the next snowing. I am ready for spring. I don’t really believe in Groundhog Day but it’s fun to watch on TV. However, in case he could be right, I hope Punxsutawney Phil doesn’t see his shadow tomorrow.

I’m trying to get back to jogging but this weather is not making it easy. I am doing Zumba classes again on Mondays. It’s supposed to snow this coming Monday. I hope it waits till after class. No matter how hard I try I can’t seem to make friends with winter. Maybe we will get along better the last few weeks before spring comes. It’s like having a house guest you can’t wait to get rid of. Like how before they leave you get excited and get along with them knowing they will soon be gone. Which to tell the truth, Summer is the only season I hate to see go.

I guess I’m starting to ramble so that should be my cue to wrap things up.

I hope February is a great month! I love a Valentine’s Day. I try to make treats for my family. Then my oldest has a birthday this month. I think every month has a couple days where dieting is out the window. Problem is, we can take one holiday or birthday and celebrate it more than once. We’re crazy like that.

Have a great night! Thanks so much for reading and God Bless!

January 16th 2018

The month is a little halfway over. My life feels busy but when I dissect it and look at it, it’s kinda boring lol. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life for the most part. Other than paying bills and things tearing up. I don’t like that part.

I am going to start teaching Zumba classes at the end of the month again. Just going to do one class a week for now. So, when I’m not cooking or cleaning I’m practicing new songs for my class.

Doing great at getting in my Fitbit step goal in. I aim for 12,500 steps at least. My eating has been very bad. I made the best homemade chocolate chip cookies last week. Big mistake! I think I ate almost two dozen in three days. I wasn’t the only one, not that it makes it right. It just makes me feel better knowing I wasn’t the only one who made a pig of themselves.

I took my youngest to get her ears pierced for an early birthday present. Then we had a girls lunch with my oldest at the Cheesecake Factory. I knew my calories would be outrageous but I had know idea how outrageous till I came home and put it in my Fitness Pal App. We had pasta, bread and cheesecake. We were celebrating remember. Good thing we don’t celebrate like this a lot. I had so many calories that my app told me if I ate like that everyday for five weeks I’d gain 14 pounds. First time it ever told me that I’d gain weight lol. This is why I should have kept track of my food during the holidays. Maybe, I wouldn’t be needing to shed a dress size now.

I don’t regret going but I should of only ate half and brought the other half home. I’ve not ate much today. I’m trying to break even on the calories.

The kids had a snow day today and they have another one tomorrow. I think we have enough snow to go sledding tomorrow, if it isn’t too cold. If it’s too cold to play outside I guess we will have to play board games indoors.

Have a great night!

Thanks so much for reading and God Bless!

January 8th 2018…..How is your year so far?

I’ve been trying to make this a great year.

It is definitely going to be challenging but I am sticking to at least trying. It can’t hurt to try.

I have a calendar in my room. Each day I color code how the day went. I have Red for great, Pink for good, Blue for okay, and Black for bad. The first week of January I’m happy to say it has five pink and two red.

How awesome, right? Well, not really. It actually comes down to how you look at things. I’m sure if I took the same days and put them in 2017 there would be two pink and five blue. It sounds as though I lowered my standards this year. I’m actually just am trying to be more grateful. Being grateful and being more thankful for what God has given to you changes your outlook. It’s kinda like the glass half full verses the glass half empty.

I know with a lot of prayer and changing my attitude. I can have a great year. Is it going to be easy? No, it’s going to take a lot of work. However, just like anything else. The harder you work for something the more you appreciate it in the end.

Here’s to another week!

Thanks for reading and God Bless!